Living in Limbo

Hanging around. Waiting. Wondering. Fretting. Feeling clueless…

Actually, I just Wiki’d Limbo and discovered good old Limbo—a place I think of as being neither here nor there, sort of poised in the middle distance—is in fact defined as “the edge of Hell.” Oof! That’s because in Catholic theology, those who die in original sin without being assigned to “the Hell of the Damned” are in Limbo.

So if yesterday these iffy days I considered myself in Limbo, I’ve readjusted the image…today it’s not quite so, um, bleak.

Mercifully Wicki smoothed things over–I read further, that Limbo has come to “refer to nothing between time and space in general.”

Precisely.

I simply—innocently (I don’t think I’m quite yet a candidate to keep Lucifer company, perhaps there’s still time for that) feel I’m in Nowheresville.

On what account?

~ From the handful of friends/relations to whom we’ve given the manuscript for an opinion, our novel has had one report. Yes, it was a bracing “Fantastic!—just fantastic what you’ve done!” Wowie zowie. But the others have not sent up a peep… This is very hard.

Except everyone says they’re “enjoying” it. Uh huh.

~ And my—what one dear blog reader wrote me about my “pesky” cancer—is still hanging around waiting to be dealt with. This afternoon an MRI…all that pounding pounding pounding, but I’ll just lie there thinking great big beautiful thoughts. No worries. Right? Right.

Then next Monday, a bit of an in and out surgery taking a smidge for a biopsy.

And THEN maybe there’ll be something to do about it.

But hey, Sylvia, what a lucky girl living at a time and in a part of the world with such sophisticated medical care! That it takes a while should be of no account.

So I’m shutting up and pressing on. Sowing seeds of salad greens. Pulling out the volunteer mosses on Ma’s bonsai (pretty, but the wrong moss). Finishing cleaning up my study.

Oh yes.

My block in Santa Cruz is not in Nowheresville. It is present and deeply involved.

P.S. Late last night one of the friends reading our novel called…she read the pages in two days…yes, she thinks her book club would enjoy it. So I’m off to my MRI with a lighter heart!